Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Life Unexpected- Our Story

I have been told by several people that writing can be therapeutic and knowing that this could be the last documentation of a pregnancy that I get, I figured I better get started.

What a whirlwind. That's really the only word I can find to describe these past 7 weeks of our life. A rollercoaster of emotions that is constantly hitting different ebbs and flows. When we were told at our 20 week appointment that our little boy had Trisomy13 (T13), we were devastated and faced with a decision that took a lot of prayer and soul searching. We laid everything before God and determined that the best thing for our family was to go forth with the pregnancy and get as many possible hours with our son as possible. Hoping for a miracle we prayed that the amniocentisis results would come back negative, we needed a miracle. Getting the phone call that Dalton did not have T13 was possibly the greatest moment of my life, thus far. Our baby was going to live.

At that moment though, something changed within Jonathan and I for the better. We had placed all our anxiety and worry in God's hands and truly given it all to him. We had no where else to turn, for Jonathan and I to be so broken, we were incapable of leaning on one another. We had to lean on the Lord. From that point on, prayer became a daily routine, and not just say your blessing at dinner prayer, I am talking having a real conversation with God. Our dependence was no longer on one another for everything, but on the Father. To the Doctors urging we continued on with the testing to find out if any chromosomal disorders were evident.

For four weeks, we were under the impression that the only 'problem' we would have, was that he had 6 fingers and 6 toes. Minor, in comparison to what we thought he could have. At 24 weeks I got a phone call from one of the many genetic counselors we had met with. Dalton's in depth chromosome tests were back, and they were not good. The counselor told me that Dalton had severe partial Trisomy 13. His life expectancy is unknown and if he does survive past the first years, profound mental retardation is certain. Back on that rollercoaster. Down we fell again, but this time the fall seemed to be more cushioned.

He has a plan. Our baby is an angel and no matter how long we have him we are going to love him to the moon and back. The 'mourning' period for this true diagnosis seems so much shorter and easier than before and I truly believe that the fact that our faith has grown so much has caused this revelation. We vowed to continue to enjoy this pregnancy and all the good and bad that comes with it. I will most likely never be pregnant again because of the genetic disorder that I have and what it will cause to any of my future children. There are plenty of babies out there that need loving parents. So, we will have our big family we always dreamed of, no matter how they come to us. God is continuing to do work in our hearts and we know that he has big plans for us all, including Dalton. We just can't wait to meet our little man and love on him as much as possible.

I am including Dalton's two most recent ultrasounds. The nice thing about seeing a perinatologist is that you get all the cool 4D pictures, so we know exactly what our little babe is going to look like, which is very cool. Enjoy!

                                                                 24 weeks
    I may be a little bias, but this is the sweetest thing ever. He is dreaming!
27 weeks. Hands always up by his nose!


  1. Kara! He looks just precious! I really enjoyed reading your blog, even though it made me cry a lot. I'm praying for you both and hoping for the best. He will be an inspiration to many no matter what, and so will you because of the strength you have. Miss you and love you lots xo

  2. Dear Kara,

    This is Leanne Whetstone's mom. I have known you since elementary grades. Leanne shared your website and ask to pray for Dalton. God is still in the miracle business. Nothing is impossible with Him. If He desires to heal Dalton, He can do it, but right now we are focus on God, because after all these things-we will glorify God! I will pray for Dalton everyday. Please anoint your tummy with the myrrh anointing oil everyday (get it from the Christian bookstore) and believe!

    Trusting God for a miracle,

    Cynthia Wisk (Whetstone)

  3. Dear Kara,

    I am Shelby Dodds' Mom, and she told me how amazing you are. Your story and Dalton will change people's lives. Therefore, you and your son are very rare gifts. Thank you for sharing such an intimate, personal story with others to learn from.

    Ann Dodds-McLaughlin

  4. Kara,
    Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. I reiterate what everyone else is saying. Dalton is a lucky little boy to have parents like you. I have always loved this when I heard it. Mother Teresa said one time that God only gives us what we can handle. She followed that by saying jokingly that she wished He didn't trust her so much! Your experience immediately reminded me of what she said. The point is that you are right. God does have a plan and knows you. Again thank you for sharing this personal journey with me. I will pray for you and your family.

  5. Kara,

    Your blog popped up on my fb page through the Hope for Hallie page. I just want you to know that I have just recently been through a similar pregnancy. I know the ups and downs and the happy/sad times. My son was diagnosed with hydrocephalus at our 20 week ultrasound and we were told that it was so severe and that termination should be considered. I knew at that moment that I had to place it in God's hands and turn it all over to him. Easier said than done at times. I defintely had my moments. At birth, the drs were amazed that the signs of hydrocephalus were gone. We did have other hurdles such as heart defects and a diagnosis of Septo-Optic Displasia. The heart problems seemed to work themselves out but now we are trying to figure out if it really is SOD. We made it 4 months and 4 days without a diagnosis of hydrocephalus and on January 12 we got the news we had been dreading. Tripp had pressure building with backed up spinal fluid on his brain. On January 24 (3 days ago), Tripp had a vp shunt placed into his brain to control the fluid. I know that things are uncertainbut know that God has a plan for Dalton, you and your husband. Tripp has defintely been a miracle baby but he has helped me grow into a better person and I am so thankful for that. Know that we are praying for you. I can't wait to see pictures of that precious baby.

    We also have a blog. It is missing 4 months Septemeber 8 he was born and I didn't update until January 13. Oh well, maybe I will get around to it sometime!